I had a regular conversation with someone at my daughter’s school this morning. Nothing out of the ordinary, nothing too crazy, just a normal everyday conversation.
Tell me why I can talk to anybody about anything but then after the fact I’ll sit there and relive the conversation in my head and anxiously curse myself for stupid things that I might have said.
It was just a regular conversation typical good mornings and how do you do. But what if I said it funny? What if I said something wrong? Did I stutter on my words? Does she think I’m absolutely ridiculous? And why did I have to say that?!?!
I’ll probably relive this conversation until the next time that I talk to someone. At which point I’ll relive that conversation a million times and wonder the same things.
When I was younger I didn’t seem to mind what people thought about me. I was actually the Daredevil in my family. I had no shame and no fear, so what happened?
Where did that Fearless little girl go and why is she this anxious bubble she is now?
As I go through my days now I try to remind myself that nobody’s opinion really matters.
That I probably didn’t say anything stupid.
That they probably aren’t even thinking about our conversation.
And if they are thinking about our conversation it’s likely that she too is thinking did I sound stupid, did I say something wrong, is she judging me right now?
Or maybe she’s even thinking to herself what a delightful conversation that was and how she hopes to have another one tomorrow. I can’t be sure but all I do know is this
Worry is like a rocking chair.
Rock. Rock. Rock. Rock.
It’s a great way to go no where fast.
Happy sunday friends.
No I’m just kidding its Monday. …..